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Hell In A Cell 2017: A shit sandwich made of the finest bread available

Not BAMF

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Usos vs New Day as the opener might have been WWE's match of the year for 2017. IMO, an easy 5* call.

Owens vs Shane as the main event was exciting, hard-hitting, tense, and featured a fantastic "WHAT WAIT WHAT?" moment from Sami Zayn turning heel (?) to help Owens survive/win. Great match.

But man... EVERYTHING in between was the hottest of garbage. Mahal/Nakamura specifically because Mahal is white bread, and Nakamura will easily phone in efforts he doesn't feel are worth his time. Mahal continues to devalue the fucking WWE Title and make it feel like a nothing prize. His matches don't even feel like title matches... they just feel like mid card nothing encounters. All I want in life is for this India tour to come and go so this can whole experiment can end.

Ziggler dominating Roode until Roode wins with a flukey roll-up while holding the tights... who the fuck books this shit? How does that help Roode, a guy who should be competing for the WWE title in a few months.

AJ loses the US title to Corbin in a generic, formulaic, yawn-inducing triple threat match. It wasn't BAD, but it was every bland triple threat match you've already ever seen. Hopefully this frees AJ up to feud with Mahal and take the title from him.

Natalya vs Charlotte was all right. Just "all right". It wasn't putrid or anything, but it did nothing to separate itself from the hairball-in-the-drain that was the middle of HiaC 2017.

Man, even the Fashion Files was bad tonight, and they completely blew past the "Who attacked Tyler Breeze?" thing by saying they solved that case off-camera.

Riv1

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Re: Hell In A Cell 2017: A shit sandwich made of the finest bread available
« Reply #1 on: October 09, 2017, 12:27:22 AM »
Cant believe Corbin beat Strowman to a singles title.
I like both guys, but thought Strowman'd get there first. Hope this isn't the start of a hot potatofest for the US title though. I hate that. 

Mahal STILL has the belt? Oy.
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Propeus The Fallen

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Re: Hell In A Cell 2017: A shit sandwich made of the finest bread available
« Reply #2 on: October 09, 2017, 01:19:51 AM »
WWE: Where the racist always wins. :)

And I think I think Roaddog might be the worst booker ever in WWE history.

Riv1

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Re: Hell In A Cell 2017: A shit sandwich made of the finest bread available
« Reply #3 on: October 09, 2017, 09:27:20 AM »
WWE: Where the racist always wins. :)

And I think I think Roaddog might be the worst booker ever in WWE history.
Just read the IWC opinions on Zayn turning heel. Pretty positive!
Gotta admit, i'm looking forward to seeing his new shtick.
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Propeus The Fallen

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Re: Hell In A Cell 2017: A shit sandwich made of the finest bread available
« Reply #4 on: October 09, 2017, 09:44:56 AM »
Remember when I said WWE was wasting Cody Rhodes as Stardust and you thought he wanted that? Remember when New Day first came out as bland faces and I told you they could turn heel and be awesome? So maybe you'll kind of listen to me this time.

Road Dog is a horrible booker. I mean, how many matches have been cut off at the worst points. Hell, one time, Smackdown goes to commercial, come back and a match had been going on. No announcement. Just happened. Not to mention look at who the champions for the brand are.

Jinder Mahal. The worst person ever to be a world champion in WWE history.
Baron Corbin US champion.

Nattie "Boring" Hart as women's champion.

Oh, and Carmella has the briefcase so if we do get a good champion, we'll get a crappy one right back.

And look at how he is booking the talent. Becky Lynch his an afterthought. Randy Orton sucks and he keeps going over talent. Nakamaru, who was as near an automatic star as you can get, has been ruined. Luke Harper is god knows where. When you're booking Tamina better than over half of your roster, you are failing horrible at your job. PERIOD.

I even hate the Fashion Police Files now! It's not going anywhere and they clearly have no damn idea what they're doing...except making sure a tag team with a pretty fun gimmick never wrestles.

Smackdown is booked like Crash TV with the worst parts. Bad segments that go no were, hardly any wrestling and matches normally have lame finishes or dqs. I'm sorry, but do I want to go through nearly two hours of the worst wrestling program of the week to maybe see something good with Kevin Owens. And most of that has involved Shane McMahon. We could have had Daniel Bryan in this role, but the WWE doctor is the only doctor on this planet that thinks he can't go at this point.

And just check out reports of the arenas. They are pulling GWF/Impact wrestling levels of empty now. You're the WWE, that should not happen! EVER. Just checked out last week's botch and Charlotte's entrance.

It's the worst wrestling show of the week and it has been since Road Dog got the solo reigns.

The best things about Smackdown are New Day, the Heel Usos, and Kevin Owens. That's about it.

Riv1

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Re: Hell In A Cell 2017: A shit sandwich made of the finest bread available
« Reply #5 on: October 10, 2017, 12:52:19 AM »
Quote
The best things about Smackdown are New Day, the Heel Usos, and Kevin Owens. That's about it.
Heel Zayn. :P
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Riv1

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Re: Hell In A Cell 2017: A shit sandwich made of the finest bread available
« Reply #6 on: October 11, 2017, 05:44:45 AM »
Yeah that worked for me. He was JUST snarky enough to sell it. Smiling the whole time.

Nice to see Corbin win clean.
That slam to the outside from the apron on Styles was brutal.
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Propeus The Fallen

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Re: Hell In A Cell 2017: A shit sandwich made of the finest bread available
« Reply #7 on: October 11, 2017, 09:24:41 AM »
Yeah, Sami did great, he was a heel who believed in everything he said. I hope they keep the happy fake smile. It would go with his theme really well.

This was a really good week of Smackdown. It was like everything I was complaining about actually done. So keep that up. I have nothing but good ideas. Like I want two really big guys to be given friggin' hammers! Maybe call them the Rampage Brothers. I'm flexible with the name.  :)

Riv1

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Re: Hell In A Cell 2017: A shit sandwich made of the finest bread available
« Reply #8 on: October 12, 2017, 12:48:06 AM »
Its funny how i was just thinking about Harper & Rowan. That should help the weak tag division on SD.
Glad the right team won the number one contenders spot.
 
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pittfox

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Re: Hell In A Cell 2017: A shit sandwich made of the finest bread available
« Reply #9 on: October 12, 2017, 02:31:43 AM »
I thought the triple threat match was good. I like Corbin though. I think he seems like a legitmate Dick heel as opposed to guys like Mahal, Owens, The Miz etc who seems to play being heels. (Even if other heels are really good at it)

I think Roode is floundering worse that Nakumura and has no upside.

The Fashion Police have always been Fucking stupid.

Riv1

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Re: Hell In A Cell 2017: A shit sandwich made of the finest bread available
« Reply #10 on: October 12, 2017, 06:02:34 AM »
I thought the triple threat match was good. I like Corbin though. I think he seems like a legitmate Dick heel as opposed to guys like Mahal, Owens, The Miz etc who seems to play being heels. (Even if other heels are really good at it)

I think Roode is floundering worse that Nakumura and has no upside.

The Fashion Police have always been Fucking stupid.
Agree on Corbin. He just seems like a legit dick. I could never see him as a face. Not since Orton (who i've never bought as a good guy) have i said that about a guy so its a compliment.

The Roode angle is dull as hell. Same with Nakamura.
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Imperial

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Re: Hell In A Cell 2017: A shit sandwich made of the finest bread available
« Reply #11 on: October 13, 2017, 04:27:42 PM »
Nakamura's problem is that he cannot really speak english. When he tries, it is painful to listen to.

They should have put Lana with him to handle the speaking. Fans liked her, so no problems in regards to her being a heel. Plus it is way better than wasting her on Tamina. Who prime Heenan would not be able to get over.
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Thorne

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Re: Hell In A Cell 2017: A shit sandwich made of the finest bread available
« Reply #12 on: October 14, 2017, 12:24:34 PM »
Isn't there some Asian that can help Nakamura in a Mr. Fugi kind of way?

Propeus The Fallen

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Re: Hell In A Cell 2017: A shit sandwich made of the finest bread available
« Reply #13 on: October 14, 2017, 04:56:27 PM »
To be fair, he can't speak english well, but he still has a ton of charisma. Just listen to the fans. The main problem is the WWE has gone all in on Jinder and--he sucks. I mean, the best I can say, is he scowls really good. That's it.

So SN  has been used to try and legitimize him. Like everyone else. It doesn't work and the other guy comes off looking worse for it.


Riv1

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Re: Hell In A Cell 2017: A shit sandwich made of the finest bread available
« Reply #14 on: October 14, 2017, 05:46:26 PM »
To be fair, he can't speak english well, but he still has a ton of charisma. Just listen to the fans. The main problem is the WWE has gone all in on Jinder and--he sucks. I mean, the best I can say, is he scowls really good. That's it.

So SN  has been used to try and legitimize him. Like everyone else. It doesn't work and the other guy comes off looking worse for it.
Ah, Jindar Mahal. The fun one of 3MB!
Thats not a bat. This...is a bat.