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Messages - SmeaGog

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1
ICT / Re: Build a non-Marvel/DC Hellfire Club
« on: August 09, 2017, 05:37:10 PM »
What exactly does a Red Queen do again? No real clue who that is, other than that it's probably some version of Jean Grey.

2
ICT / Re: Crime Cartel builder
« on: August 01, 2017, 06:47:34 PM »
Kingpin
Baron Harkonnen


Enforcers
These Guys:

(Fezzik, Inigo, and Vizzini, if and when the image fails to load.)

Shady Real Estate
Donald Trump


Trafficking
Fu Manchu


Sex Trade
Al Swearengen


Cyber Crime
Irene Adler (Sherlock)


Gang Etiquette
The Man with No Name


3
General Comic Discussion / Re: What issue is this in!?
« on: July 26, 2017, 06:46:29 PM »
Superman is Jewish, Riv. Contact with the Christian cross probably just hurts his skin.

4
ICT / Re: Elmer Fudd vs Batroc
« on: July 25, 2017, 02:42:42 PM »
That's exactly right, actually: Batman fought the watered-down, Gotham-noir version of Fudd to a draw. He got embarrassed badly by cartoon Fudd on every conceivable level in the back-up, once they met, and had to sell out every single Robin just to stay alive.

(Bugs'd talked Fudd into thinking it was Bat-season in the set-up -- at which point he shoots Bruce Wayne repeatedly in the fucking face.)

5
ICT / Re: Weakest magic user that can beat Superman?
« on: July 25, 2017, 10:55:57 AM »
No one if he ko's them before they get a spell off.

Cain would absolutely murder him in that scenario. Which isn't even what was asked here, really.

6
ICT / Re: Assign an X-Man to your fellow posters
« on: July 21, 2017, 08:15:14 AM »
RIV = Wolverine - say what you will about the guy, but he's fucking everywhere (including entirely different franchises), too stubborn to know when he's beaten, completely devoid of self humor, and thinks he can somehow hurt other people by slashing his own hands.
Also comes with a stupidly long memory with some truly strategic gaps.

Jellyrobes = Storm - a proud, black, spiritualist who one way or another seems to like black Africa best from a distance.

Liquidsailor: Fantomex - primarily because this is the sort of person who'll feign a French accent for years just to irritate some random strangers. Similarities run a little deeper, but I don't really feel like typing much right now.

Scourge: Kitty Pryde - most of the time he'll just float through whatever you throw at him without caring, occassionally doing something clever or taking a trip through space. Maybe slightly less bullet-proof in actual one-on-ones.

Rock: Beak. Also a distant shout for Beast, probably.

Average John: Beast - calm, quietly funny, and pretty much hideous. Mostly has better places to be at, these days.

NGL: Dazzler - habitually into the stupidest fucking things, but otherwise alright.

Hamburglar: Deadpool.

Wyntyr: probably Gambit, at this point. Hamburglar could have been Fantomex, or maybe the other way around.

DLB: The Juggernaut.

Nate Grey/Cable - Stryan and Pie.

Cyclops's basically every guy on this forum who ever picked up an attitude he didn't quite live up to. Let's say Damien, maybe?


And that's probably more X-peeps than I actually really know anything about now, so I'm thinking we're done.

7
ICT / Re: Create your own Suicide Squad
« on: July 20, 2017, 09:05:33 AM »
I know 2/8. God damn

Guy, how have you not read Sleeper yet? It's basically the best book Wildstorm ever published.


It was also fairly heavy on the TAO.

8
Parker Lewis can't lose. Really. It's not just crippling OCD, either - his mother cut a deal with Satan when he wouldn't take his chores seriously as a boy, now he's cursed always to succeed, Earth X style. More disturbingly for him, he recently realized he's also cursed to always try his best (obviously a relatively new development).
High school can be difficult for anyone, but in winning everything, will young Parker finally lose... himself?

Doctor Doom is actually a doctor now. He went to... Doom school? Sure, whatever. Doctor Doom went back to the States, enrolled in a fraternity, pursued hijinks with earnest, and got himself a Ph.D. in temporal catastrophi. If he walks, talks, and acts like a comic book man, it's only because he's been classically trained for it now. Otherwise he's much more chill these days. All that cannabis really seemed to help.

Deathstroke the Terminator was a frustrated olympic swimmer. His terrible technique has literally cost himself an eye on live television at one point, but it wasn't until the biggest swim of career ended in Olympic tragedy that he'd truly earned his name. What should have been the best day of his young life became his personal Vietnam, and turned him into the jaded mercenary we recognize today. (He still took gold, incidentally. There were no survivors.)

When fully commited to his idiotiic freestyle stroke strikes, he harnasses an ability not entirely unlike Slaymaster's.
Still picks and loses fights with Aquaman.

The Goon has only recently recovered from a stroke. He smiles constantly like a... well, like a fucking goon, really, and talks about the god-damned cockwatch more than any grown man should, but otherwise it seems to work for him, somehow. He looks happier now. People seem to like him more. His Karma rating's through the fucking roof.

"Ozymandias" is really a corruption of the name "Ossie Ardiles", the aging Argentinian ex-footballer who, through time-travel and a little moxie, became the legendary figure behind all African proto-myth. Not that anyone who took the name since even knows it, but the greatest African dynasties recorded were all definitely descended from a modern schmuck of mixed European and South American heritage.

Indesputipably.

9
General Chat / Re: The new board look
« on: July 03, 2017, 01:41:07 PM »
Not mobile friendly.

Horribly anti-mobile and ugly as shit

All of those things, plus it looks like we've reverted to downscaling avatars for no particularly good reason again? Is hacking this shithole seriously the only way to get anything done around here?

10
ICT / Re: Each of these characters attempts to assassinate Thor
« on: July 02, 2017, 01:53:17 PM »
Actually, Slig wasn't Jokerized, was he? He'd kept the face and made some Joker fish because it seemed like such a good, wholesome way of wiping out humanity, but mostly he was just doing his own thing before presumably getting back to the Fourth World.

11
ICT / Re: Slowest person that can tag all-out Spider-man
« on: June 24, 2017, 06:18:16 PM »
The Turtle
Kitty Pryde
The Aquarian

Etc.

12
Marvel Zombies / Re: Thanos Gets Another Ongoing Series
« on: June 22, 2017, 06:22:20 PM »
Use his words like an adult, I mean. Obviously he's always been a cuck.

13
Marvel Zombies / Re: Thanos Gets Another Ongoing Series
« on: June 22, 2017, 06:19:14 PM »
Using his words, and whatnot, like a cuck.

Thanos would never do that.

14
Ask The Staff / Re: What happened?
« on: June 22, 2017, 06:12:10 PM »
Really?  Oh, damn.  Well, all of you have to let us smite and applaud you from now on.

None of me can seem to see or vote in public polls either (or post new ones, for that matter), but I'm not sure whether that's a global thing or just my rampant homophobia.

15
ICT / Re: Supernatural power heirarchy
« on: June 22, 2017, 10:20:18 AM »
Did the Winchesters ever really bind Death successfully? I haven't watched this show in ages, but if it's the scene I'm thinking of, I'm not sure that's really how it went down.

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