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Topics - SmeaGog

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ICT / Drizzt Do'Urden runs the Drizzt gauntlet
« on: June 22, 2018, 04:46:56 PM »
For the most part, anyway. Some of these may either fit the basic archetype better then Drizzt specifically, or be here mainly just to fill the numbers, but mostly these are all dark, pale, brooding reflections of his own self he'll be murdering, if not the other way around.

Despite being called a gauntlet, fights are all completely stand-alone affairs. Feel free to break things down further into categories if you see the need, or to add whatever tormented sword and sorcery type you feel we're missing here (hell, half your game library should fit).

Benedict of Amber (generic equippment; equal arms; no magic and/or panthers)

Duncan Idaho (again, pure swordfight, on the principle that he's basically Zaknafein)

Elric of Melnibone

Himura Kenshin (anime only)

Jeff Smax (w/ singing sword again, for whatever that might be worth)

Sethra Lavode

Anomander Rake

Vampire Hunter D

ICT / Strongest Transformer Sargeant Slaughter can defeat?
« on: May 16, 2018, 05:31:46 PM »
Nods to Ultrabender and the Eighties.

ICT / The Metabaron vs. The Emperor of Mankind
« on: March 23, 2018, 10:27:12 PM »
The Metabaron accepts a commission from the Emperoress, ostensibly to remove a powerful pretender, but really just to flush out our resident Eurotrash. Using one-sided prep time and forgoing the Bushitaka if necessary, can he destroy the cosmic Archie Bunker?

Digitally of course, through either Kindle or the Comixology storefront. Deals seem to include just about every recent collection Marvel's published, including Secret Empire, the complete Vision Director's Cut, and some Star Wars shit, as well as some new collections of older material like The Death of Jean DeWolff and Simonson's Thor run.

Most of you will have probably heard about it a couple of days ago, but I figured it was worth a shout all the same.

ICT / Shirtless Bear Fighter vs. Six Gun Gorilla
« on: October 09, 2017, 03:53:47 AM »


ICT / Jeff Smax vs. Fin Fang Foom
« on: October 09, 2017, 03:34:32 AM »
These two idiots, if you're wondering:

ICT / The Authority vs. YIVO
« on: June 10, 2017, 06:37:38 PM »
It is the closing days of the 20th century, and rather than a cold, impersonal creator, mankind has finally made contact with what it always thought it wanted - an overly loving God. A kindly spaghetti monster who'll look favorably upon each and every one of us. This guy, basically:

But can God's love worm its way into the hearts of some of Earth's edgiest, most cynical defenders? And could they stop him if it can't? Can Man ever truly love the tentacle, is the gist of what we're getting at here.

ICT / And now for some scans of Batman getting beat up by a girl
« on: June 09, 2017, 07:42:50 AM »
All from the recent "League of Shadows" storyline in Detective Comics. Also in this thread: Batman gets his mind raped repeatedly again (guy must be asking for it at this point, right?), Cassandra Cain goes to Orthanc, and Ra's al Ghul reveals he can now talk backwards a little bit, although he had to get a teacher first.

But mostly it's about the latest Gotham MA power rankings, really. As most things are.

Detective 950:

The world is full of fragile, fragile people. People like Batman, basically:

Detective 951:

Subtlety really is wasted on bimonthlies:

-"You ever think about what would happen if you had to fight her, for real? Not sparring. The real deal."

-"Of course I have. I'd lose."

Detective 952:

Probably one of the more interesting scenes in this thing, really. It's Ra's al Ghul having a brief sit-down with Shiva in the midst of ongoing hostilities. It's alright:

Shiva vs. Cassandra Cain, round one:

Poor form all around, really. Maybe Batman will do better:
(But no, he gets Camel Clutched)

Finally, some confirmation Shiva may be hurting people:

Detective 953:

Teenagers are the worst:

Some more Shiva vs. Orphan:

Detective 954:

Shiva isn't the only one who's been secretly pulling her punches. Ra's al Ghul has had Bruce Wayne hooked on phonics on the down-low for years:

He also makes, or has access to, the most wonderful drugs:

Elsewhere, Kathy Kane's father is getting ready to mansplain some basic facts of life to his scrubs:

-"There are probably around two hundred of them in that complex right now -- the most dangerous fighters ever to live on this planet.

Fanatics from every corner of the world, ready to die to serve their master. You could fight one of them and win, maybe even a handful at a time... but fighting all of them... all at once...

Batman couldn't do it. My daughter couldn't do it. You couldn't do it.

Who the hell do you think could?"

Which naturally means coming up next, it's House of Super Dead Ninjas:

Sports Talk / This place badly needs a football thread about now
« on: March 08, 2017, 04:55:43 PM »
The real thing, that is. Fuck your gridiron and Not Bamfs and what not.

ICT / Martian Manhunter vs the Impossible Man
« on: September 30, 2016, 11:05:16 PM »
Two green, shape-shifting aliens who at some point in there histories spent some time being every living member of their race. But is being insane and somewhat ubiquitous enough to give post-Flashpoint J'onn the edge here, or is IM simply outside of his weight class?

ICT / Recast "The Joker"
« on: August 06, 2016, 01:58:43 PM »
The Steve Miller Band song, that is. We might as well, we get one of these things a day lately either way.

The obvious requisites are "Space Cowboy", "Midnight Toker", and "the Gangster of Love", but your other options include "Picker", "Grinner", "Lover", "Sinner", "Smoker", and "Maurice", or anything else you think can you work with in there.

And if you can find someone who's played their music in the sun, you are most probably a bawss.

ICT / Deathstroke vs. Jonah Hex
« on: July 17, 2016, 07:15:53 PM »
With or without weapons. Winner gets to keep Batman.

ICT / Granny Weatherwax vs. Frau Totenkinder
« on: July 17, 2016, 06:51:01 PM »
Two surprisingly popular witches 'round these parts. They violently bicker over the best way not to eat kids - who wins with and without prep?

ICT / Replace the Justice League: free-form edition
« on: June 06, 2016, 02:00:41 PM »
Nods to Fin Fan Thing.

The rules this time around are simple: recast or otherwise replace the Justice League using seven to ten members and none of the Big Seven. Otherwise, feel free to use whatever theme you like, or none at all. Pick Seven snorks if you want to, it's all good.

Just try to make it somewhat interesting, obviously.

ICT / Shang-Chi vs. Elektra
« on: April 18, 2016, 08:37:02 AM »
The most talented unarmed fighter at Marvel takes on Elektra - probably also the most talented unarmed fighter at Marvel, since these words don't appear to have any meaning.

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